Williamsburg

  WILL

Age: 34

Artistic Shtick: PRODUCER 

After his father died, Will received a large inheritance and a series of existential doubts.  He then packed his bags from Philly and moved to Williamsburg to establish his own production company.  Serving both rental and production needs, Will began to do very well, enjoying and wallowing in the promise of the American Dream and her phantom, impossible-to-get-rid-of sisters: Cocaine, Alcohol, and Hookers.  Currently, Will has carved a music video niche in the underground Brooklyn Hip-Hop Scene.  

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 BROTHER JAMES (aka BJ)

Age: 33

Artistic Shtick: PAINTER 

Every morning at noon, you’ll see native the North-Carolinian, Brother James, haul his paintings down to Bedford Avenue between North 5th and 4th Streets where he will set-up his street gallery.  Here, he will hack his art until dusk, whereupon he will return to his studio lair.  An Art Major in School, BJ initially moved to New York to gain access to the Gallery scene; somehow, mystically, he found himself wearing a suit, knee-deep in the Market Research Industry. After two years of tirelessly recruiting focus groups for pharmaceutical companies and very little painting, he quit his job and pledged to support himself solely by selling his paintings.  This decision was made four months ago: thus far, he has sustained himself on a diet of hot-dogs, homemade lemonade, Coors Banquet Beer, and Samson Tobacco.  All four of his credit cards have defaulted, and he owes his landlord for five months.  He has sold one painting to date.         

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ADELLA

Age: 29

Artistic Shtick: ILLUSTRATOR 

Born and raised in cold, alcoholic climate of Presov, Slovakia, Adella immigrated to New York City when she was 21.  Unable to speak a word of English, she survived as a house-cleaner at first as she picked-up English from television, radio, and rock n’ roll.  A year into her stay and a mediocre grasp on her English, she arrived at a new client’s apartment to meet Monty, a struggling, effeminate, yet affable actor.  Through a murky concoction of practicality, generosity, and affection, they went to the courthouse two weeks later. Monty helped Adella gain citizenship and obtain college loans so that she might pursue her dream of becoming an illustrator.  Their marriage has since grown inexplicably cold.    

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 ANNA

Age: 27

Artistic Shtick: WRITER 

Anna is the first of two children belonging to a single Puerto Rican mother.  Growing up, she not only looked after her younger brother, Miguel, but she watched her mother waste away, working two jobs, getting nowhere playing by the rules.  When she wanted stylish clothes, her mother said “No.”  When she wanted a gold chain with her name on it, her mother said “No.”  And, alas, the straw that broke the camel’s back, when she wanted that tattoo, that bouquet of flowers on her lower-back, her mother said “No.”  She then learned quickly how to hustle.  Initially, she delivered packages for pot-dealers in Bushwick, Brooklyn; then, realizing that she was getting middle-manned, she decided to solicit her own, home-grown product, middle-man free: vagina.  Anna currently works for herself as a prostitute, has a 2-bedroom condo in South Williamsburg, and is able to not only save money, but also help her little brother and her mother when needed.  However, in spite of her financial success, she has become bored.  Always seeing herself as a creative person, she began penning her experiences as a Prostitute.  In a few months, she will begin shopping agents and publishers.  

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 MIGUEL

Age: 16

Artistic Shtick: FILMMAKER 

Miguel is the second of two children, younger sister to Anna, belonging to a single Puerto Rican mother. Though his sister, Anna, kept her illegal prostitution business at a low-profile, he soon learned the value of the hustle from her.  So, saving up his money, he bought his first .9 mm, and began holding up the very trust-fund hipsters that were gentrifying his neighborhood.  Having been thoroughly affected by his first viewing of John Cassavetes’ “Killing of a Chinese Bookie,” he decided early-on to use his earnings to fund his first feature-film that was based on his real-life, hustler lifestyle.  He is still saving…         

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  TRUMAN

Age: 34

Artistic Shtick: WRITER 

Embittered by the miserable failure-of-a publication-that-was-his-first-novel, Truman has since focused his efforts on the screen-writing trade.  He has spent the last year, working on his first script and emboldening his artistic, Texas-size ego by seducing woman and having them read passages from his novel aloud to him. To this day, Truman says that he would exchange his womanizing abilities for a break in the screen-trade.  This wish has yet to be granted.     

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